Week of 7/8/09

Another week has passed, another bunch of comic books have been written, and more covers are offensive. It is time for the

Five most offensive comic book covers for the week of 7/8/09

5. X-Men: Legacy #226

I was watching X-Men: The Last Stand on TV the other day, and Rogue was a teenager. If she had big breasts, they weren't emphasized in the movie, because I certainly didn't notice them. So I guess the point of this cover is that she's all grown up now, and so are her breasts.

"Check 'em out, boys!" That's what I imagine she's saying.

I'm sure someone out there is going to object: 'But she's just standing there," they're going to say. "Why, she's even wearing pants! And you can't see her butt! I don't know what you're complaining about."

To which I reply that, unless her superpower is to shoot rays out of her breasts, there is no reason for her to fling open her cape and arch her back, sticking them out for all to ogle. That's not even a combat pose, unless like Batman that's where she keeps her bulletproof armor and she's hoping to get shot there.

Ouch.

4. X-Men Forever #3

Did I mention that I just saw X-Men: The Last Stand on TV the other day? Well, I did, and one thing I didn't notice was Kitty Pryde's breasts. She was still a teenager in that movie, and if she had big breasts, they weren't emphasized, because I sure didn't notice them... er... somehow I'm getting deja vu here.

If you're a long-time X-Men reader, you'll be familiar with some of the previous artistic incarnations Kitty's gone through, like this one:



...and this one:



Hmm, you know, I think that Ellen Page actually has smaller breasts than any of the previous incarnations of Kitty.



Something tells me that superhero artists need to study up on female anatomy a little more.

But the key thing here is that in all those previous drawings, and in the movie, whatever the size of her breasts, she seems to have worn a modest costume that didn't show them off and make them look like mortar shells.

Also, she doesn't seem to usually stand with her hips cocked at a crazy angle.

3. Street Fighter II Turbo #7 B Cvr Wang

I know nothing at all about Street Fighter Turbo except that it's based in some way on a game. Whether the game it's based on features a mostly undressed woman lounging back in an awkward position, playing with handcuffs, I could not tell you.

Regardless of whether or not the various scenes montaged onto this cover are lifted from the video game, I can't see any reason to depict two guys in the midst of battle, and one woman looking like a hooker who specializes in S & M. Don't the women in the Street Fighter video game fight? Surely they do. So why isn't she fighting? And why isn't she wearing pants? And why do her shorts look like they've eroded away to almost nothing? And why is she wearing a bra with no shirt?

This kind of sexism is even more offensive than what we get on those X-Men covers above. On those the artist has objectified the woman's breasts; on this, the artist has objectified the entire woman.

2. Ms. Marvel #41

Marvel is having a good week. And a good week for Marvel is a good week for protruding breasts.

What really sets this cover apart-- and I won't pretend that I know why there are two Ms. Marvels, one in red and one in black-- what really sets this cover apart isn't red Ms. Marvel's breasts sticking forward (and note that she does Rogue one better; not just arching her back, but throwing her shoulders back as well, to achieve maximum breast protrusion). No, the thing that really sets this cover apart is that while red Ms. Marvel is sticking her breasts out, she's standing on black Ms. Marvel's throat and chin!

It's violence against women and breasts being stuck out, all at once.

And I'm not quite sure what dimension red Ms. Marvel's foot has slipped into, but she's somehow stomping black Ms. Marvel's throat in such a way that it's making black Ms. Marvel's right breast stick up even though she's lying on her back!



It's like red Ms. Marvel is standing on a bicycle pump or something. And black Ms. Marvel's breast is the innertube.

I know, that metaphor doesn't make sense. Yet that appears to be what's depicted.

1. President Evil

Oh, my goodness. Comics just seem to looooove Barack Obama. And by 'love' I mean 'want to denigrate.'

To be fair, this is not nearly so bad as the Devil's Due comic from two weeks ago. Not because the cover is particularly better but because there's no interior preview of this comic from Antarctic Press, so I can't tell if the story involves demons telling Barack that they want his ass.

What is up with comic book writers pitting Barack Obama against demons, anyway? And should I comment on the fact that for some reason the cover is a parody of Army of Darkness but the title is a parody of Resident Evil? Surely David Hutchison knows the difference between Bruce Campbell and Milla Jovovich...?

In case he doesn't: Ash is the one with one hand and one chainsaw-hand. Alice is the one in a red dress. There, that should clarify.

Honorable mention:

Yeah, because that cover was just so damn good, Devil's Due couldn't let it go. Now it is an offensive poster. Nice.

Week of 7/1/2009

A week has passed, more or less, and it's time once again to peruse the shelves at our favorite comic shop, or in this case, website. Specifically, I've been browsing the comics for the Week of July 1, 2009, keeping an eye out for any that jump out and poke me in the eye. In a bad way.

Here, then, are the

Five most offensive comic book covers for the Wednesday of July 1, 2009

5. Exiles #4

People like Jeff Parker, and I can understand why. He's a nice guy with a good sense of humor. And I am certain that he had nothing to do with this cover, although I won't guarantee that the interior isn't similarly problematic. However, a glance through the online preview doesn't suggest that the comic actually features three dead women, one of whom is being held up by her hair.

What's up with the fact that Marvel thinks this is the way to sell comics? I know people who like Jeff Parker and may be buying this for his writing; I'm pretty certain that they're not made more likely to buy the comic by the dead women on the cover. Parker is known for his clever stories and his characterizations, not for killing superheroes (or are those villains? I'm not sure where Scarlet Witch falls these days).

No, I'm pretty sure the cover isn't meant to attract Jeff Parker fans. I think Jeff Parker fans will already be buying the book, and I think Marvel knows this, and I think they put that cover on specifically to attract a different group of readers. The interior art is nothing like the cover art; the cover is gritty and angry and all about violence and death. The interior art is bright and clean and a bit cartoony. I don't think that people who are attracted to the cover would necessarily be attracted to the interior art.

I think Marvel's editors made a calculated decision. "People who like Jeff Parker," one of them said to another, "Are already going to buy this book. We need a cover that's going to sell copies to people who don't care about Jeff Parker."

"Yeah!" agreed a second editor. "But who doesn't care about Jeff Parker?"

"The question," pointed out the first editor, "Isn't 'who doesn't care about Jeff Parker?', but what do people who like Jeff Parker not care about?"

"Um," the second editor said, "Huh?"

"Look, it's like this," the first editor said, rubbing his hands together deviously, "We put some picture that fits with the story on the cover, and who's going to buy the book? People who were going to buy it anyway! What we want to do it put some shit on the cover that's going to suck in a whole other demographic!"

"What's a demographic?" the second editor asked.

"Guys who wanna see dead chicks held up by their hair! Yeah, that's a demographic!" the first editor said, drooling a little.

I'm pretty sure that's how it went down.

Now I'll probably be proved totally wrong when Jeff Parker kills off a total of seven women, who are then used as projectiles in a huge trebuchet jointly constructed by Professor Xavier and Magneto - constructed not as a weapon, mind, you, but as a device for getting rid of the unwanted bodies of dead superheroines.

4. Greek Street

From the solicitation text, I'm guessing this is based on a Greek myth. A Greek myth about a scary tattooed woman in a bikini. Because if she wasn't in a bikini, how could you see her scary tattoos?

But seriously, the guy on the cover is running down the street in a thick hoodie and jeans.

Perhaps I am not giving the person who wrote the cover enough credit, though. Perhaps the cover is actually carefully plotted and for reasons of internal logic, it is quite hot over in the corner of the cover where the woman is, while it's chilly and rainy over where the guy is running down the street. Yes, I think that must be the case.

3. Secret Six #11

Artemis has evidently been enslaved in a see-through bathing suit, in the rain, with a circle of gawkers ogling her. I think there's a good chance that William Moulton Marston would approve of this cover, considering his well-documented love of covers featuring Wonder Woman in bondage.

I just sort of feel like, in Marston's drawings, Wonder Woman's usually not in a see-through bathing suit.

2. Witchblade #128

Witchblade, Marc Silvestri's most exploitative creation, is all about offensive covers. This one is pretty ordinary by Witchbladian standards. The whole concept of the comic is, wouldn't it be cool if this chick with big boobs had armor that magically groped her while she was fighting monsters and stuff? I mean, that's pretty much the whole comic in a nutshell.

And amazingly, it has lasted 128 issues.

1. Marvel Divas #1

Has enough been said about this?

The only thing I'll add is that, actually, I don't think I find it quite as offensive as last week's #3 cover.

Which means, come to think of it, that Barack the Barbarian is still the most offensive cover yet covered in this blog. Two weeks running! Woo-hoo! Kudos to Devil's Due.

Week of 6/24/09

Every week comic books come out. Hurray.

Some of them have inexcusably offensive covers. Boo.

Here I will display and discuss my choices. Enjoy.

5 most offensive comic book covers for the week of 6/24/2009:

5. Grimm Fairy Tales #39

I know, I know. Why even bother putting a Zenescope comic on the list? Zenescope - for those not familiar with this particular little publisher - puts out mainly softcore books based loosely on fairy tales. I mean, if you're being forthright about the fact that you're publishing erotica, it's not really offensive to have a half-dressed woman on the cover. And I'm giving Zenescope a pass on all their other covers this week. But this one, by David Nakayama, is just going a bit too far. It steps across the line from erotica to exploitation, at least insofar as it is a cover image. This cover doesn't say, "This comic is about sex!", it says, "This comic is about impractically dressed, disempowered women!"

4. Gotham City Sirens #1, alternate cover

This cover almost doesn't bother me that much. You see a bit of Cat Woman's ass (I assume that's Cat Woman, it doesn't look like what I think Cat Woman usually looks like, but I don't know what other 'Gotham City Siren' would be dressed as a cat), but other than that the costumes and poses aren't terribly exploitative. What gets me is (a) the fact that these three presumably dangerous women are depicted as sex objects (and you can't miss the fact that Harley Quinn is making kissy face at the camera) and (b) this is the alternate, variant cover. Presumably the variant cover should be less offensive than the primary cover, when the primary cover is...

3. Gotham City Sirens #1

This doesn't even really require comment. Is Harley Quinn's costume painted on, here?

2. Barack the Barbarian #1, alternate cover

Find it hard to believe that Devil's Due would stoop to this? I dunno, they've released some sexist covers before, but this is the kind of thing that leads to cease-and-desist orders. Seriously, I wouldn't have much of a problem with this if it wasn't specifically designed to demean someone. If the barbarian on the cover wasn't a real person, I would barely even notice it.

Of course, if past behavior is any indication, I might guess that Sarah Palin would be flattered rather than offended.

However... if that isn't bad enough, there's always

1. Barack the Barbarian #1

Holy crap. Are you kidding me? If that isn't bad enough, how about this interior panel:

Ummm... who writes this stuff?

Oh, Larry Hama.

For those who aren't aware, Larry Hama is a very well-known and highly respected writer in the comics industry. In fact, he was just selected to receive the first ever Henry Y. Kiyama award, which will recognize "the contributions of Asians and Asian Americans to US comic book culture."

Nice to see that Larry is also contributing to the depiction of African Americans.

Honorable mention: Jungle Girl Season 2 #4, risque cover

I thought it was actually kind of sweet of the guys at Dynamite to provide Jungle Girl with that lovely CENSORED strip to cover her bare ass. How thoughtful.